Beer Crimes

Tragedy struck in Northern Ontario when a delivery truck filled with Grolsch beer swerved to miss a moose that had wandered onto the two land highway and lost 90% of its cargo.

It was about 7pm and the beer filled truck was heading north on the Trans Canada Highway to Thunder Bay when the accident occurred. The local police department released this statement

“Most animal related accidents occur in this area around dusk. The animals are unsure of the surroundings because of the poor lighting and travel from the east side of the highway to the west where there is a fresh supply of water. We are told from the truck driver, who will remain anonymous, that a large moose wandered onto the highway. The truck driver swerved into the oncoming traffic and then back into his lane narrowly missing the moose, but unfortunately lost most of the beer the truck was carrying.”

Grolsch Beer Accident on Road

Detective Drivakos also mentioned that there are rumblings this might not be an accident. Some witnesses have said they saw a man in the woods waiting for the moose on the other side of the highway wearing a Moosehead t-shirt. There are theories that the moose was a professional and was hired by Moosehead Breweries to stop the delivery truck from reaching its destination.

Thunder Bay is a part of the Canada that hasn’t changed in over 70 years. They have two types of beer, Labat 50 and Molson Export and they are still served in the stubby bottles. Brewers see Thunder Bay as an untapped goldmine and figure the first to get there will win the beer race. Grolsch had enough beer on that truck to get every man, woman, and child drunk for weeks. Now they will have to go back to Holland and brew another batch before attempting another dangerous trek to Thunder Bay.

If anyone has any information regarding the whereabouts of a moose that fits this description

Moose Head Beer Logo

Please call the Thunder Bay Police Department immediately.

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